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I Can't Fix It

from Welcome to the Danger Show by Marc M Cogman

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about

Written in July or August of 2006, just demoed with Garageband, and recorded for Danger Show at a variety of locations. Justin Siegel and Frogs played the drums and bass, respectively. I played the upright piano, glockenspiel, hand-percussion, harmonica, acoustic guitars and sang all the vocals. Dave Delhomme added the B3 organ and Nelson Lindsley the electric guitars.

This tune stands out as a bit different from the others as it’s the only “relationship” song on the record about a different relationship. While the others were focused elsewhere, I wrote this song post-breakup about the three and a half year relationship that had just ended a couple months prior. All in all, this song’s about how sometimes, knowing a decision was the right one doesn’t make it suck any less, on an emotional level. After not seeing the girl I wrote this song about for over four years, we crossed paths on tour in Chicago in the fall of 2010 and attended each other’s shows, and I got to play her this one for the first time.

lyrics

You wonder what I’m doing: these days I’m always cleaning house, moving things around. And trying to forget the day you first moved in, when everything was sparkling and life was for the opening. And the cat, her belly to the floor, eyeing every doorway, unsure of what lay ahead. But all that fades eventually. You learn the geography and there’s no mystery left. Forgive me: you didn’t need this stuttering, this scratching at the scab, but the cuts still itch so bad and I can’t fix it. I’m sorry: you didn’t need this elegy, this salt rubbed in the wounds, but there’s nothing I can do. I can’t fix it.
You wonder where I’m going: I’m spending much more time on the road, going it alone. And I’m supposed to be improving, but I still close my eyes at every single show. I hide inside a poem. Forgive me: you didn’t need this stuttering, this salt rubbed in the wounds, but there’s nothing I can do. I can’t fix it. I seem all right, but I lie awake at night, hedging all my bets and fending off regret. Can I risk it? And the face you have in photographs, well, it may sell the clothes, but I know it’s just a pose. You crack between the clicks.

credits

from Welcome to the Danger Show, released March 27, 2007
Marc M Cogman - acoustic guitar, electric guitar, lead vocals, backing vocals, glockenspiel, piano, percussion, and harmonica
Justin Siegel - drums
Frogs - electric bass
Nelson Lindsley - electric guitar
Dave Delhomme - B3 organ

Produced by Marc M Cogman
Recorded at subSpot (Venice, CA), Record Plant (Los Angeles, CA), Red Skeleton Haus (Los Angeles, CA), and Delhomme's House (Mar Vista, CA)
Mixed by J.D. Andrew at YeRusto! (Santa Monica, CA)
Mastered by Brian "Big Bass" Gardner at Bernie Grundman Sound

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